Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Relationships while on dialysis

To my earlier post Treading cautiously, Bill Peckham asked "I hope when you wrote "I know that in my situation, this is not a luxury I can afford" you did not just mean dialysis."

Unfortunately, I did mean dialysis. I feel (my opinion only) that having relationships while on dialysis is difficult. Not impossible certainly, but difficult. And more so in the Indian context.

I feel scared. Of rejection. I'm not exactly a cracker of a looker! (Well, I'm not that bad either!) And to add to it, I have this huge fistula in my upper left arm. People have been shocked on seeing it. I also find it difficult to climb more than a flight of stairs. I am on a restricted fluid diet. With all this, I'm too scared to even try.

For me, rejection will be too emotionally disturbing to take a chance. Heck, even normal people feel scared to try and take things forward.

Again, this is ONLY MY view. I'm sure there are many people who probably have fallen in love and succeeded with a chronic disease. Hats off to them!

2 comments:

Akbar Pasha said...

In the book 'Microtrends' the author talks about a new emerging market of 'very long tailed dating'(no pun intended). I am sure there are dating sites catering to - as you described 'chronic disease'(ed) people. I cannot find the link but I am sure Google would be of help.

Vinay Mantha said...

Hey Kamal, IMHO unless you try, you would never know. Fear of rejection is there to some extent or other in every one, however unless you are confident about yourself, you can never express your feelings, and unless you express your feelings, you dont know if you would succeed.

So, my suggestion to you is to convince your bheja that :

"Hey i do have health problems AT THE MOMENT, but within a decade MAX advances in medical technology will fix my problem for good, and i will just move on with a normal life like others. So, there is no reason why i should hide my feelings and live a different life than i wish to".

My 3 cents
Vinay Mantha